26 - Insomnia and side effects - August 2nd, 2008

So it is 3:17AM est and I am wide awake. I have actually been wide awake since 2:00AM, but gave it my good hour try in bed before making the decision to get up. This, unfortunately, is how it has been since I started the lurpon and dexamethasone on Sunday. The most aggravating issue about this is that I also can't sleep much during the day. I have never done speed before, but I can only imagine that this is what it feels like. I bet the drugs aren't solely to blame for the insomnia - I am sure there is a psychological element to it. When I do wake up, my mind starts spinning about the whole process and I can't seem to turn it off. Hopefully, in a day or two, I will be blogging about my solutions to this insomnia...but I haven't figured a solution out yet.

The one thing I did do is clear my plate for this weekend. I had intentions of going to a family reunion on Saturday and Sunday, but after not sleeping all week I realized that I should probably cancel in case I finally do crash this weekend. I already feel that just making the space to really take care of myself has alleviated some stress.

The other side effect I am experiencing is that I am bruising at the injection site (s). I read about this a little last night and found out that it is a result of jabbing the needle in too hard. I know I've been doing this - I just want to get it over with. One suggestion was to ice the injection site area. This numbs to area and makes it easy to put the needle in very slowly. So tonight I will give that a try.

The fertility diet has become a little more challenging as a result of starting the drugs - again, I think this is more psychological than physical. The best way I have found to deal with this and continue to stay on course is to address one meal at a time. I say to myself "Okay, I just have to drink my protein shake and eat my multi-grain toast and peanut butter for breakfast...then I will reevaluate at lunch.", rather than thinking about how I am going to need to deprive myself all day of foods I am starting to really want. If this fails, the mantra "it's for the baby" usually does the trick.

Overall, these side effects are minor. I am trying my best to go with flow and take care of myself at all costs, even if that means some serious breaches in social etiquette.